Journey

Sometimes our journey is fun and exciting and sometimes not so much...

When that happens it's usually a sign that we need to slow down and take it easy, maybe even spend some time alone with God.  Sometimes I think when I feel under the weather God uses that time to produce really good fruit in me.  It gives me a chance to take it easy, listen more, and realize how much God's love means to me.

Invariably when I take time to listen I am blessed beyond measure.  The quiet times have increasingly become the best part of the journey.

Fun and exciting aren't as important as they used to be.  It's still good once in a while, but more and more quiet is a great part of the journey of life.

My Sons

I have three grown sons and when I look back 20 years there were times I felt a little overwhelmed.  We had fun, and laughed a lot, but they were very gutsy and were full of surprises.

Now, the thing I love the most about them (then and now) is that they told me exactly what they thought.  What's great is that they almost always left me laughing.  Even when I was trying to tell them they shouldn't be doing something, I ended up laughing so hard I could hardly talk.  Some people would say I should have had more control and that I shouldn't have laughed.

I don't agree.

Those are the times I remember best.

The laughter.

The surprises.

The intrigue.

It's real life.  

Moses

I once had a beautiful party color cocker spaniel named Moses.

Now, Moses was the happiest dog I've ever known.  Moses loved people, loved to be petted.  Moses brought me great joy because when I would come home from work he was always so happy to see me.

He would run in circles, wag his tail, pant, and bring his toys.

He welcomed me home.

I loved it that he wanted to see me.

Sometimes we just need someone (even if it's our pet) to welcome us home and make us feel wanted and needed.

Loving someone, and letting them know you love them makes the moments of life worth living.

I'll always remember those moments with Moses...moments of glee and charming affection.  What moments do you remember?

Goodness

There is a state park not far from where I live and it's one of my favorite places on the planet.  I love going there to walk and enjoy the good things God created in nature.  Several years ago while in Colorado on vacation I decided I loved the pine trees and I wanted to grow my own pine trees from seeds.  I took Botany in college, so I dug out my old books and started to read how to sprout a seed to grow a tree.  I was excited about growing my own tree.

Turns out it was a lot harder than I thought.  I gave up after five or six tries, but in the course of the activity I came to realize what a miracle it is that God created a wonderful "system" so trees would produce seeds that would sprout new trees.

God's goodness comes to us in unexpected ways. Now when I look at trees I see miracles all around me. If my experiment had not failed I might not have realized what a miracle a new tree is for us.  I also came to realize that I love to walk in the woods, smell the trees, and see God's goodness all around.

What "goodness" has God brought to your life recently?

Suffice it to say...

Being loved is an incredible blessing.  There's nothing quite like feeling like we are loved and cared for because we feel safe and secure in that person.

It's hard for me to imagine that there are people on the planet who have never experienced that kind of safety.  There are people who are not secure in knowing that someone loves them.

I think of a young woman who has been taken from her home and sold into slavery...

I think of a young child who doesn't know who her father is and her mother has died of aides...

I think of an elderly man who is dying alone in a hospital bed...

I think of a poor forgotten homeless woman who is dying from starvation and has no-one to care for her...

Thinking of all of those people reminds me I am called to care, called to love, called to do what I can to tell others to reach out and love the world around us with the love of Jesus.

You may not be called to fight against human traffiking, or to go to Africa to help orphans who are left alone.  You may not be called to do hospital visits or to seekout the homeless to touch them with God's love.  You are, however, called to love the people in your world. 

However you are called, faithfully love...

Naked Ladies

One of my favorite things about the month of August is naked ladies.

Now, I am NOT talking about women nude at the beach.  I'm talking about a beautiful flower that my Grandmother Ireland had in her yard.

They came up out of nowhere for my birthday every year the first week of August.  They are the most beautiful pink delicate flowers I've every seen.  For years I thought they were just for me because they came out for my birthday.

I also remember them because my Gramma actually said the word "naked".  I thought that was funny.

Sure didn't take much to entertain me.  Come to think of it, I still like little surprises that God sends!

Miracles

My dad loved to pray and I remember watching him when he was quiet and wondering what he was praying about.  As I got older I would ask him questions about praying.  He talked about experiencing God's peace and love.  He also talked about miracles.  He believed (as do I) that when we ask, God answers.

I used to get frustrated that I would pray and didn't get a miracle.  When I would ask my dad why nothing happened he would say, "It did happen...you need to see it".

For years I didn't know what that meant.  I came to realize that every time I pray God shows up.  I now know that there are miracles all around us, I just need to listen, watch, and feel.

Miracles are there - today - right in front of you.

Ask, and see what God has done!

Where is God?

I taught my kids that God is everywhere, all the time.  I wanted them to know that no matter what happens to them, God is present and even though they cannot see Him, God is there. 

When my middle son was three years old (because he was third born), he had heard numerous times that God is everywhere and that God is WITH him.  One Thanksgiving, just after he turned three we went to a community-side church service.  People from all over our town came…Methodists, Catholics, Baptists, Presbyterians, etc., and the pastors all wore their traditional attire for the service.  The pastors would rotate for community services who would share scripture, who would preach, who would do offering, and who would host. 

For that particular holiday, the pastor from the Disciples of Christ Church was preaching and he wore his black robe.  He was a tall man, and he wore a long black velvet stole.  As he walked toward us to greet us, I noticed my son had his mouth open and his eyes were as big as saucers.  I wasn’t sure what was going on, so I stepped a little closer to him as I greeted the pastor.  After the pastor shook my hand, he turned and walked to another family.  When I looked down at my son (whose eyes were still wide open), he whispered, “Mom!  God IS everywhere…he’s right here.”

While I was trying really hard not to laugh and thinking how to explain to my son that God IS everywhere, but the man in the black robe was NOT God, my oldest son poked him and said, “Where’d you get that idea? That’s not God, it’s just another pastor.” 

I started to explain to my young three year old that yes, it was a pastor but that God is everywhere. When he said to his brother,  “IS TOO! God is here.” 

Okay, with that, I decided to let it go.  God is here was quite good enough for me. 

P.S. Of course, in time my son did figure out the man in black was a pastor and he probably didn’t remember the encounter that day.  What he did remember is that God is Everywhere.  It just doesn’t get better than that.

Overwhelming

There were times on my journey through Motherhood that I felt like I was overwhelmed.  Some days I was tired of wash that didn’t seem to end and other days I was overwhelmed with constant bickering:

Mom, he hit me

Mom, he took my truck

Mom, he stole my cookie

Mom, she keeps telling me what to do

Mom, he LOOKED at me

(Looking at me was always one of my personal favorites!)

Parenting is without a doubt the most difficult thing I’ve done, and also the most rewarding.  Even though I felt exasperated, overwhelmed, unprepared, and totally feeling incapable of doing a good job, it turned out quite okay.  My best advice for young parents is:

Love them more

Give hugs freely

Talk to your children (regularly)

Validate their feelings

And most of all PRAY for them daily.  Pray for them today, tomorrow, and for their future.

Pray that they will BE who God intended them to BE.

Those are the things that REALLY count.  The bickering falls away…the laundry gets done…they DO stop hitting…they learn to share cookies and toys…they stop telling each other what they SHOULD do…and best of all they learn to LOOK at each other.

: )

Journey of the people of the Way

The people of the Way, as the early believers were known, wasn't an easy road.  They were heavily persecuted by the Romans, they practiced loving everyone and because of that they regularly visited the sick and dying, caring for them, bringing them food and water, cleaning them as they laid in their beds.

The early Christians risked their lives taking care of people who had plague.  So, in addition to being stalked by the Romans, they were regularly exposed to disease and death all around.

Interestingly enough, their journey often led them to scatter throughout the Roman Empire and as they scattered they loved and cared for others as they went and they became known as the people of The Way who love everyone.  People knew they loved enough to risk their lives to help others.

The combination of the persecution and disease are the very things that spread the good news of the love of Jesus throughout the empire and the world.  The worst of conditions brought a great result.

As Paul said in Romans 8:28, "all things work together for good."

True Friends

Through the years my definition of true friendship has changed.

When I was in kindergarten someone was a true friend if they sat with me at lunch and didn't push me down on the playground.

By 6th grade someone was my true friend if they didn't make me hold a snake! (I had that happen, and right then and there I decided that was an important characteristic).

By 10th grade someone was my true friend if they didn't steal my boyfriend.

By college the measure of a true friend was that they didn't "rat" me out.

By the time I had kids someone was a true friend if they could tolerate my four kids (not an easy thing to do some days).

By the time I had several teenagers running around the house I considered someone to be a true friend if they consoled me for "having it out" with one of my teenagers and they didn't judge me.  (In other words, they understood I was at the end of my rope).

When I divorced I found out the measure of a true friend was someone who loved me even though I wasn't married, had lost my new 2200 square foot house, and had very little money in the bank (friends in those days were few and far between, but there were a few who remained true).

Now?

Now I consider someone to be a true friend if they love me and forgive me no matter what.  That means, when I make stupid decisions they love me.  When I screw up they forgive me.  When I fall apart they hold me.

The one thing that has remained is that the measure of a true friend is that they are faithful.  At different stages and in different ways, I needed someone who is faithful.

What I hope is that I have been that to many of you.

Thanks for being there and being who you are!

Cardboard Boxes

When my oldest three kids were little (the oldest three were born in three years) we used to play a lot.  One of their favorite things to do was to play "train" using a cardboard box.  They would all pile into the box, smallest in front and I would push them around the house.  We would make train noises an they would giggle and scream.  Sometimes I would turn a sharp corner and they would lean so far out that they would tump over.  Then they would scream, jump, and run back to the box shouting, "more, mommy!"

We loved to play and we did it a lot.  

I did try to get some work done, but as soon as I would get one room straightened another would be demolished.  Once, someone came by our house unexpectedly and she was so surprised by the mess that I was embarrassed.  I vowed to be a better mom and keep the house cleaner.  Fortunately, after a few weeks we got to playing again and I forgot about my vow to keep a perfectly clean house.

Today I would do things quite differently.  

I would invite the guest to join in the game. 

I would do a lot more with cardboard boxes, like building forts and tunnels.  

In other words, I would relax and focus more on playtime and less on what NEEDED to be done (according to the world's standards).  

When young mothers ask me what I did right I tell them I played, prayed, and gave out a lot of hugs.

When asked what I would change, I reply that I would love more freely, play like there's no tomorrow, pray out loud (instead of to myself), and hug all the time.  Oh, and for Christmas I would get them a good supply of cardboard boxes.  

A Gift

I don't know who created art, but it was a genius idea, and was definitely blessed by God.

I did not have a good day at work, but I spent the night playing with scissors, glue, glitter, pictures, wire, rocks, wood and paint.

Not only was it great fun...it was a gift.

A gift of healing.  

What a Journey we are ON

I've written about my vacation escapades with my kids, and about the fact that every vacation it seemed like some new "event" occurred.  Whether it was burning cars, flooded tents, unexpected illnesses, or burned camping food, we always had something happen.

Interestingly enough, those are now our best memories.  One summer we headed to the east coast with New York City as our final destination.  We planned and dreamed of going to New York, Philly, DC, and exploring parts of Virginia.  We rented a pull behind camper that was surprisingly reasonable for a camper that slept 6 (with two dogs).

I should have known we were off to a bad start when we picked up the camper.  Looking at the outside I exclaimed, "Six?  Where?"  In all my life, I'd never seen a camper so small.  Well, after a little creative thinking (stacking) and re-arranging, we figured out where everyone would sleep.  I told the kids, "It'll be FUN, you'll see."

Off we went from the mid-west toward the east coast.

When we traveled I had a system set up for making sure we had enough money to survive while we still ate food that had nutritional value.  Breakfast usually consisted of cereal, fruit, and milk.  Lunch was peanut butter and jelly sandwiches (my personal fav), chips, cookies, and milk.  We ate dinner out, which sometimes was Mickey D's, but even that wasn't cheap as much as the boys ate.  We got used to the cramped quarters, stale bread, lack of variety, and barking dogs and for the most part everything was going fine.

Then my oldest son got sick...really sick.  He was never sick (ever) and so it hit him like a train.  He had a fever of 104 and was weezy, couldn't breathe, and was miserable.  Because he had never really been sick (and he was around 11 years old), he turned out to be a bit of a problem.  He refused to eat or drink anything and he wouldn't talk to anyone.  He barely let me take his temperature.  By the time we got to Gettysburg, PA and found a drugstore, he was looking really bad.  The druggist called doc back home and we started him on antibiotics and various other medicines.

He still wouldn't eat.

So, in order to get him to eat I started asking, "will you eat soup or drink soda?"

"Will you eat crackers?"

"Will you drink juice?"

Nothing worked.  I couldn't get him to eat or drink anything.  Finally, I asked, "will you drink a shake?"  He said, "yes" and we headed to Mickey's to get him a vanilla shake.

Well, naturally everyone in the car wanted a shake.  I explained that we had food for everyone but not enough money for all of them to have shakes.  Suddenly, their mild concern for their sibling turned into massive contempt.  Someone shouted, "he's fakin' you know!"

I took up for my sick son, but by that time it was too late.  The crowd was out of control and about every five minutes someone would mumble, "he's fakin'".

For the rest of the trip my oldest son had a regular diet of vanilla shakes.  That was all he had, but I was glad we were getting something in his stomach!  

Slowly my son did recover.  We saw a lot of sights, the Capitol, the Liberty Bell, the Statue of Liberty, President's homes in Virginia, and the beach, but through it all, the other kids continued to mumble, "he's fakin'".

It got so bad that I was rolling my eyes...

Well, I wish I could say that my kids learned a great lesson in caring for their brother while he was ill.  It would be nice if I could share a great story about how they prayed for their brother on that vacation.  I know I prayed a lot because I was scared about how ill he really was and I suggested several times that they pray.  All I heard was "H-U-M".  In the end all I can say is that we survived.  I really felt like they thought it was a horrible trip because they didn't get to have a regular diet of vanilla shakes.

So, here's the funny thing.  Through the years, one thing has remained...the memory of those vanilla shakes.  Now when we talk about "fakin'" everyone KNOWS what that refers to, and how it came about.  "He's fakin'" became the tie that binds us together (in God) and makes us family.  "He's fakin'" became our motto and forever part of our memory.  They barely remember seeing the Statue of Liberty, but they sure remember watchin' their brother drink yet another vanilla shake.  Today, they all still mumble, "he WAS fakin'" and we laugh outloud.

"He's fakin'" BECAME such a part of who we are and that IS a gift!

Understanding

When I was little (well, littlier) I remember not knowing what to do next and getting confused about which way to go at school, or when playing outside at home.  It's never taken a lot to get me confused (still doesn't).  I think that's why it means so much to me when someone understands me and takes time to connect and take time to help.

When I was in high school my best friend was almost polar opposite of me.  She was tall, slender and athletic. She disliked English, Spanish, history, but loved gym class and did pretty well in business math classes.

I was short, never slender, and was never an athlete. I loved English, Drama, Speech, Debate, Spanish and history.  I was never good at math and my worse grade (by far) was always in Gym class.
I don't know how two people who were so different found each other, but when we met at the beginning of our first year of high school we became instant friends.  As the years wore on, we came to understand each other and we supported each other.

I helped her in English and she pulled me through Gym class.  I understood that writing term papers was difficult for her and I tried to find ways to help her utilize her skills as she wrote.  She understood that pull-ups were grueling for me and she worked with me to help me meet the minimum requirement.

Looking back, it was a great blessing to have someone in my life who knew me, understood, and helped carry me through.

She understood when I was lost, scared, and confused.  I think that's what I love most about Jesus.  I don't really have to tell Him when I'm lost because there's never a time when He doesn't see me (Pslam 139) and if I am scared He is right there (Psalm 23).  My confusion is never too much for Him (Proverbs 3:5-6); God is trustworthy.

God knows YOU and loves you...He understands everything about you.  Take a few minutes to let that sink in.  Rest in the thought that God knows you and understands.  

For as Long as it Takes

Fasting is an interesting practice and part of my Christian journey.  I’ve done many different kinds of food fasts, but until recently I haven’t experienced very many other kinds of fasts. 

Several years ago however, my Spiritual Director challenged me to “fast” from books. 

Yes, you read it right…books.

I asked my Spiritual Director “for how long?”  and he responded, “for as long as it takes.”

Now that might be easy for some people, but for me it was worse than telling me I couldn’t have water.  I was immediately agitated, irritated, and upset.  I kept trying to play mind games with myself and tell myself I didn’t want to read.  After about 24 hours I found myself clutching a book saying, “what’s one page? I could just read one page and that won’t hurt, right?”

After 4 weeks I realized I was hearing God more clearly, and after six weeks I knew I was practicing quieting my mind so I could hear.  Peace was ever so close. 

I eventually did return to reading, but the exercise taught me how to quiet my mind so God could speak clearly.

There are other fasts that help to quiet the mind and those include:

Fasting from cell phone

Fasting from all electronics

Fasting from television, radio, and media

Fasting from talking

Pretty much, anything you depend on and habitually practice is a good candidate for your fast.

One thing I know for sure – seeking God and God alone reaps a generous reward.